Use highly revolutionary and experimental methods to take care of your headache

You visit the local billionaire and ask him how he deals with headaches. Excited, he takes you to one of his many companies where they murder monkeys by putting microchips in their brain.

"Okay," he says, "All we do is put this microchip in your brain and I'll be able to root your wetOS and turn off the 'TerribleHeadache' registry key."

"Are you sure you know what you're doing?" you ask.

"Oh no," he says, "I'm a huge idiot that pays other people to be smart for me but I'm too stupid to not constantly undercut them in a pathetic attempt to seem smart myself."

"Oh," you say, "You see that's what I thought but there's, like, a lot of people who genuinely think you're a genius?"

"I'm not," he says, "I just have a lot of money, which makes extremely stupid people think that must mean I know what I'm talking about."

"Okay, fine," you say, "This whole conversation is just making my headache worse. Do it."

The billionaire has his technicians flip your skull open and dump a big bucket of 8088 microprocessors on your exposed brain flesh. It just makes your head hurt worse.

Dejected, you take some normal painkillers. They work well enough. Probably would have worked better before they filled you full of implants. As a way of saying sorry, the billionaire gives you a stupid flamethrower that he had sitting around. You graciously accept the flamethrower and promptly burn him alive with it. You find this very satisfying.