Aquire a whoopee cushion

Yes, what you need is to get that youthful exuberance back into your life!

  After a few days however, the whoopee cushion is no longer enough to amuse you. You start filling the world's salt shakers with sugar, and the sugar shakers with salt. You saran wrap toilet seats and hand out exploding cigars. 

  Eventually you find yourself in your new (expensive and fast) car, driving yourself to the mall to 'hang out'. As you check your (appropriately evil) combover in the rear-view mirror, you realise that you're in the middle of a Superdarklord midlife crisis. 	

Unconfirmed